4th of July 2011
Our dearest firstborn Samantha,
Every year, I try to write your siblings and you a letter on your birthday, I know I have some unfinished ones stashed away in my drawer, ready to go into the memory box that you each have with you. This year, especially, Mummy would like to share with you some very important things/memories/events as your turn 11.
11 things actually.
Yes, I know, you are still 2 years short of being allowed to have a facebook account( you do have a tiger mother), and you are still practically the only child in your year group that doesn’t carry a mobile phone, and you don’t really bug me for either, so for that I am doubly proud of you.
Ever since you came into our lives 11 years ago today, you have made me, ‘your ole ma’, a whole new different person, a better person in all.
1. I became a parent, your mother, and that changed my life completely. Every day, since you were born, I am reminded about how blessed your dad and I are that we choose to have children. You, our firstborn, came in your own sweet time, after only 4 and a half hours of labour, only 4 days past your due date- minus any epidural, and with laughing gas that made only Daddy laugh,( and I finished a whole Bill Bryson book and even had a book discussion with Dr Woo in early labour)- you arrived as quite a whooper- 8 pounds 2 ounces and 52 cm long and I recall Dr. Woo saying to me, where did you hide her all these months? And you arrived on the 4th of July, which is why you are named Sam.
2. By 2 months, you understood that mummy HAD to return to work( very sadly) and you started sleeping through the night, waking up for a 6.30 am feed before I had to go to school then going back to sleep till 11.00am, so I didn’t feel too guilty about leaving you with Aunty Ruli. Those early months of rushing back at lunchtime, to nurse you and to check on you and to make sure you were okay will forever be etched in my memory. I think you were instrumental in starting Mummy on a multi-tasking route that would be taken to greater heights in the years to come. You understood that Mummy had to work, had private students to teach, and always, papers to mark, and you have always been an easy baby, taking long naps- sleeping in your car seat all the way on our numerous car trips to Penang and Singapore, and even on flights, you were so good that I could watch two movies from Perth to KL!
3. You MADE me the kind of mum who would make my own flash cards for you, and I miss those days when we were in your old room in our former house, doing flashcards with you while you sang, chatted, read and hugged, cuddled and loved.
4. By 20 months, you had decided on your own accord( and you are actually a quietly strong, resolute, dignified dragon) that you have had enough of Mummy’s milk, and in your OWN WORDS, declared, “Mummy, I have had enough nien nien, I am a big girl now!”- after gagging over my milk as a toddler!
5. When we lost your beloved grandmother when you were two and a half, I remember grieving and pregnant, in tears one night in your room, but you, ever strong and resolute and sensible, even at that age, determined to take care of me, running to me a whole box of tissues from the other room and patting me back until I fell asleep. ( I think Daddy had to work the night shift then).
6. When your baby sister was born 3 years later, you were and still are the perfect caring older sister. You helped us throw away dirty nappies and tissue paper, you would bring me clean flannels and nappies, and most of, you were such a sport when Belly Boo used to drink up your formula in one gulp! Seeing how you are with your siblings reveal to me the caring side of your nature.
7. Though you became a little shy in pre-school( Daddy and I were convinced that you lost your confidence after Grandma passed away as you were so close to her), you NEVER failed to try at every single thing that you do, even at Kumon Maths which you hated. You have made and kept some really good friends from Montessori years, and that’s a testament to what a great little friend you are.
8. And now, as you grow from a tween into a kinda mini teen already, although there are times we disagree with some issues, and there are times when there is awkwardness between us, as I know will be, as part and parcel of our relationship, I just want to let you know you MUST never forget that your Mother is ALWAYS right. ( Smiling….)
9. Ever since your first birthday, when we had that huge yummy chocolate NO. 1cake coated with enough M & Ms to give anyone diabetes, you brought Mummy a new dimension to birthday parties. Having celebrated 11 birthdays with you, and gone through many themes- from your Power puff craze days to Nemo, to that puppet show Daddy and I put up on your 4th birthday with a proper stage, to created a fairy garden for your fairy party, Mummy has become the pro at planning birthday parties, and sourcing for party packs, or making my own decorations complete with DIY special paper cups and plates. Mummy has never derived more joy than planning and organizing a birthday party for you, my sweet girl. ( and hence for your siblings too)
10. This year, especially, we have seen how much you have pushed yourself in all that you do in and out of school. And you have made us so proud of you. You went for House Captaincy even though you are not the sportiest of girlies and got it. You ran so fast in your cross country that you got into the top 10 for your girls’ category. But most of all, how you worked hard in Maths, which is not your strongest forte, but you worked diligently, and pushed yourself, and made sure that you got the grades. You have acquired a deeper sense of confidence and skills and have attained so many other achievements in dance, music and poetry and reading competitions. You make my heart swell with pride. But remember, the road ahead, in secondary school, is where the real tests lie- balancing your academics with your social and co-curricular activities and making sure that you remain that all-round global citizen but most of all, maintaining your true persona, and not have to cave in to peer pressure, and staying sensible.
11. And reason no 11, there should be an unending list, but really, you have defined me as a person. You ( and your siblings) are so much a part of every decision I make in my life, your Daddy and I do what we do best so we can give you the best, in terms of a strong family foundation, religious grounding, strong values and ethics, inner confidence and a strong awareness of the world around you.
Darling, this is your last year in primary school and already Mummy can feel my apron( well, metaphorically, since I don’t even come close to owning one), strings loosening already. I miss you baby smell, your chubby fingers, ( yes, they once were fat!), your dark dark eyes, so large and round when they stared at all the books we always read together, you coming to show me your art work after craft class, I miss holding you taking you for doctor’s appointments for your jabs and all. And I still look forward to your cuddles in bed every night!
On your birthday, darling, don’t forget to:
Love fully and care deeply.
Be kind and gentle, but firm when you have to be
Your prayers.
Think of others
Stay creative, be open to new ideas and change when you have to adapt.
Be loyal to your friends, but don’t lose sleep over a disloyal friend. Sometimes, human nature is complicated.
Eat your veggies, esp. broccoli, and never underestimate the power of an apple.
Remember, your family loves you to bits.
God Bless you, our darling little girl.
With all our love,
Mummy ( & Daddy)
xoxoxoxoxo
